Disclaimer--I don't own Dragon Ball Z. If I did, there would be more Bulma/Vegeta moments. Instead, it's owned by Akira Toriyama, Bird Studios, and Funimation.

Ricki Lake: Lovers Who Cheat On Their Cheaters

by: Bulmafox

[OOLONG channel surfs. He stops on a talk show.]

Oolong: Wow! Ricki Lake! Let�s see what it�s about!

[On TV]

Ricki: Hello, I�m Ricki Lake. Are you tired of those poor, victimized women who do nothing when their boyfriends cheat on them? Well, today�s show is about women who give their men a taste of their own medicine. Find out what happens when lovers cheat on their cheaters.

[RICKI LAKE theme song plays]

Ricki: here is our first guest, Bulma Briefs�

Oolong: Oh my gosh! I can�t believe this! [Calls everybody and tells them to watch Ricki Lake]

Ricki: Bulma, tell us a little about your boyfriend.

Bulma: He�s a scrub!

Ricki: A scrub?

Bulma [singing]: A scrub is a guy who thinks he�s fly, also known as a buster. Always thinking �bout what he wants�

Ricki: All right, I get it. I don�t need a song.

Bulma: Fine! Anyway, Yamcha�s a baseball player, yet he�s broke 90% of the time; he cheats on me with a string of women, and worse yet, he cares more about fighting than he does me!

Ricki: Wow, he sounds like a playa to me. Yamcha, come on out.

[YAMCHA walks out onto the stage, and the audience boos at him]

Yamcha [to the audience]: Shut up! [Sits down]

Ricki: Yamcha, the audience really hates you.

Yamcha: It�s her fault! [Points to BULMA]

Bulma: My fault?! How is it my fault?

Yamcha: It�s your fault you�re such a [Shouts a long string of obscenities]!

Everyone watching the show: Yamcha�s really in for it now.

Bulma: WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?!?!

Yamcha: You heard me.

[BULMA jumps up, grabs YAMCHA�s throat, and shakes it back and forth violently]

Yamcha [in an unusually high voice]: Stop, Bulma! You�re strangling me!

Bulma: Good! You deserve it, after what you called me!

Ricki: Bulma! Bulma, calm down.

[BULMA lets go of YAMCHA, who slumps to the ground, gasping for breath]

Bulma [to RICKI]: I am calm!

Ricki: Don�t you have something you want to tell Yamcha?

Yamcha: What news? Don�t tell me. I know, you�re cheating on me. [Laughs]

Bulma: Actually, yes, I am.

Yamcha: With who?

Bulma: Wouldn�t you like to know!

Ricki: Other Man, come on out.

{OTHER MAN walks onstage and sits down.]

Everyone watching the show: VEGETA?!!

Yamcha: You�re cheating on me with Vegeta?

Vegeta: I can assure you that she�s not kidding, punk.

Yamcha: So, have you guys...you know...

Bulma and Vegeta: Yes.

Bulma: And guess what, Yamcha. I�m pregnant.

[YAMCHA doesn�t look too shocked]

Bulma: With Vegeta�s child.

Yamcha [almost chokes on his own spit]: YOU�RE WHAT???

Bulma: You heard me.

[Everyone watching the show gasps in shock. Chi Chi faints]

Dr. Briefs: I�m going to be a grandfather... to a Saiyan? [Clutches his chest]

Puar: Oolong, call 911! Dr. Briefs is having a heart attack!

[Oolong calls 911]

Yamcha: You animal! How could you do this to her!?

Vegeta: Now wait just a minute! It wasn�t like I forced her or anything.

[YAMCHA throws Kamehmehas at VEGETA, but misses every time. A classic DBZ battle ensues. Everyone deserts the studio except BULMA, who hides behind a prop. When the battle ends, YAMCHA is beaten up, and everything is destroyed except for one camera. BULMA and VEGETA kiss right in front of YAMCHA and walk off. YAMCHA stares in disbelief, then droops his head]